Monday, February 1, 2010
Day 22 continues to 23
the past 21 days have absolutely wrecked my life. God is so good. He's taught me so much; probably one of the most surreal "potter-clay molding" moments yet. i feel layed out before the Lord, in complete surrender to Him. every aspect of my life was placed at His feet in complete devotion to Him, saying God it's yours. my heart longs nothing more than the will of my Father. i want to honor and please Him with every part of my being, every area of my life. i committed my finances to Him and through His guidance, i'm building a future for me and Kaylie. so excited, i will be debt free this year!! i'm learning a more frugal way of living, joining in on iheartpublix.com and infamous couponing! my first grocery trip with coupons, i bought $63 worth of groceries, saved $36 and only spent $27!! i left there beaming with excitement (it's the little things). whew, i can do this!
i also am learning to better parent by the perfect parent Himself. Miss Kaylie Faith is coming up on the big 5 in July and her little self has shown quite the attitude (rolling her eyes, "just whatever mom", morning fits about what she's going to where, and oh those "little white lies") Father help me. so much frustration was building in me bc this is the first time i've faced these challenges and i felt like i was failing. for me, in the baby stages... it's natural to feed, nuture, love and cuddle my precious baby girl. my weakness- discipline! i've found myself in moments of desperation wanting to ball my eyes out, saying God what do i do?! i never complain about being a single mom bc we truly have so much support and love that i know we are beyond blessed! i (we) have a huge support system around us that is rock solid, i have the greatest family ever. with that said, it's hard trying to be both mom and dad. i'm not dad, i'm not meant to be. i have to be the very best version of mommy that i know God's created me to be and allow God to fill the role of Father in her life. i'm reading Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp,. it's a hard read for me bc of the stretching that's taking place but i know that i'm learning so much and the benefits are already showing from that. last night, she came in and got ready for bed, put her dirty clothes in the hamper and her shoes up in her closet, without ever being told!! YES LORD!! (it was rewarding to see, i had such a proud mommy moment).
the book teaches you to look at the matters of the heart and realize the heart issues behind the reason they are acting out, getting to the core and breaking it off now. understanding that we (parents) are to view it in the light that ultimately, we are leading our childrens heart to delight in obeying our Heavenly Father, not just to make them act right when it's convenient for us (so humbled by this).
Kaylie's my delight. i find myself just watching her laugh and being so goofy (i don't know where she gets that from) .. it brings so much joy to my soul. i have to put myself in place sometimes, bc i can get so busy and caught up that i miss those things. our favorites are singing as she plays her hot pink acoustic, imagining we're princesses in a castle waiting for our Prince Jesus and bed time stories that she reads to me by the pictures she see's are my favorite. we love to play hide-n-seek all through the house, running from room to room. the priceless bedtime prayers at night, comforting boo boo's and if ever she finds me crying, she always says, "it's okay mommy, Jesus is right here." i then, can't help but smile. oh my sweet kaylie faith. what a precious life God has blessed me with to shepherd and lead her little heart. a little life that matters so much to me and so much more to God, that even when she was in my womb, God himself was watching over her.
excited to continue to share all that i'm learning...
kristy
i also am learning to better parent by the perfect parent Himself. Miss Kaylie Faith is coming up on the big 5 in July and her little self has shown quite the attitude (rolling her eyes, "just whatever mom", morning fits about what she's going to where, and oh those "little white lies") Father help me. so much frustration was building in me bc this is the first time i've faced these challenges and i felt like i was failing. for me, in the baby stages... it's natural to feed, nuture, love and cuddle my precious baby girl. my weakness- discipline! i've found myself in moments of desperation wanting to ball my eyes out, saying God what do i do?! i never complain about being a single mom bc we truly have so much support and love that i know we are beyond blessed! i (we) have a huge support system around us that is rock solid, i have the greatest family ever. with that said, it's hard trying to be both mom and dad. i'm not dad, i'm not meant to be. i have to be the very best version of mommy that i know God's created me to be and allow God to fill the role of Father in her life. i'm reading Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp,. it's a hard read for me bc of the stretching that's taking place but i know that i'm learning so much and the benefits are already showing from that. last night, she came in and got ready for bed, put her dirty clothes in the hamper and her shoes up in her closet, without ever being told!! YES LORD!! (it was rewarding to see, i had such a proud mommy moment).
the book teaches you to look at the matters of the heart and realize the heart issues behind the reason they are acting out, getting to the core and breaking it off now. understanding that we (parents) are to view it in the light that ultimately, we are leading our childrens heart to delight in obeying our Heavenly Father, not just to make them act right when it's convenient for us (so humbled by this).
Kaylie's my delight. i find myself just watching her laugh and being so goofy (i don't know where she gets that from) .. it brings so much joy to my soul. i have to put myself in place sometimes, bc i can get so busy and caught up that i miss those things. our favorites are singing as she plays her hot pink acoustic, imagining we're princesses in a castle waiting for our Prince Jesus and bed time stories that she reads to me by the pictures she see's are my favorite. we love to play hide-n-seek all through the house, running from room to room. the priceless bedtime prayers at night, comforting boo boo's and if ever she finds me crying, she always says, "it's okay mommy, Jesus is right here." i then, can't help but smile. oh my sweet kaylie faith. what a precious life God has blessed me with to shepherd and lead her little heart. a little life that matters so much to me and so much more to God, that even when she was in my womb, God himself was watching over her.
excited to continue to share all that i'm learning...
kristy
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